Monday, June 1, 2009

The Story

1993 we met in correspondence
she knew exactly what to write
to get into my heart and mind

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

1995 she confessed her love for me
she told me her whole life was a lie
she needed me so she could fly

love is forever
love always grows
this is the most
precious dream I know

1997 two years of bliss and pain
I gave her control of my brain
she tried to make me go insane

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

1999 I gave her everything I could
from far away I waited for her
to do what she said she would

all the while she was begging me to hang on
all the while she was asking for everything I could give
all the while she was keeping me living in yesterday
using the power I gave her to keep me so far away

1999 she begged me to hold on
wait for me, she said, and I did
even when she was gone

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

I never really knew what was going on
all I knew was that my heart was gone
she begged me to leave it in her hands
is there anyone who understands?

2001 I crawled back to where I came from
finding myself lost and broken
half waiting half trying to understand
what happened and how to begin again
without my heart, how to begin again

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

2004 a correspondence, first time in three years
I felt my anger and pain dissolve in precious tears
I asked her why she actualized my greatest fear
I asked her to return my heart and mind if she would not come here
her silence fell upon me once again (I asked, why won’t you share?)
her indecision rose like a wall once again (I asked, why don’’t you care?)
only to find her that she would once again… disappear

I thought my heart was open
I thought my doors were open
I thought I was ready for love
so why am I alone

I thought that I was free and
I thought that I was me and
I thought I was over the past
I though that I had known

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

2008 again a few words from so far away
she confessed she used me, what else was there to say
was I the fool still waiting for her to return my heart?
and now, am I free?... where and how do I start?

she said she married another and he gave her a child
she moved on but she still will not let go
there is no room in her life for me today
but she will not let go
is it because I know

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know

love is forever
the best I’ve got
how it can end is something
I still do not know

all the while she was begging me to hang on
all the while she was asking for everything I could give
all the while she was keeping me living in yesterday
using the power I gave her to keep me so far away

I never really knew what was going on
all I knew was that my heart was gone
she begged me to leave it in her hands
is there anyone who understands?

she still keeps the best of me
under her lock and key
even though she started over long ago
had another child with another man in 1999, oh
and yet she still will not return the things that keep me hanging on
so what am I to do when my heart and mind are gone?
this is the only way I know to carry on

love is forever
no matter what
love is still the most
precious dream I know

The Prologue



I am so far from the person I used to be
I used to sing
I used to dance
I used to love
passion, romance
I used to run
I used to fly
I used to dream
my mind could touch the sky
I used to feel
the human touch
I used to want
to be in love too much

how far I fell
to hear love’s calling
could it be that
I am still falling

love is forever
no matter what
this is the most
precious dream I know