life gets lonely when friends move away
when the one you live with does not want to stay
from strangers to roommates to partners and friends
it's usually sad when the sharing ends
and you know you'll move on
and you'll find someone new
and sort of replace them
and come out of the blue
but just for a while
there is time to digest
and feel sad and lonely
before what comes next
some slumber in new fantasies
or linger in sweet memories
you can wonder why no one comes knocking at your door
you can wonder why your phone does not ring
you can sit home alone wondering if no one cares
but all that wondering does not change a thing
when you're ready you'll go out and say hello
to old friends and strangers with hope in your eyes
and maybe somebody will come and not go
but whatever happens...
life gets lonely when friends move away
when the one you live with does not want to stay
from strangers to roommates to partners and friends
it's usually sad when the sharing ends
so now there is room in your life and your space
so how do you let the world know
without seeming too vulnerable or desperate
without letting too much of the lonely show
are you ready to go out and say hello?
or do you slumber in new fantasies
or linger in sweet memories
sweet memories
yes you know you'll move on
and you'll find someone new
and sort of replace them
and come out of the blue
but until you do
until you do
until you do
life gets lonely when friends move away
when the one you live with does not want to stay
from strangers to roommates to partners and friends
it's usually sad when the sharing ends
listening to the words of a song
from a movie that was a play will someone care
sung by the members of a life support group
for people dying of aids
suddenly i am aware
that everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
it may be more obvious with cancer or aids
but we all share the same fear
of being alone at the end
old age is the final card that is played
if none of the others do it,
old age will, my friend
for everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
sometimes i want to end it all while i can
rather than be alone when i'm helpless at the end
sometimes i want to end it all, do you understand?
no one answers when i ask who will be the friend?
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
for everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
listening to the words of a song
from a movie that was a play will someone care
sung by the members of a life support group
for people dying of aids
suddenly i am aware
that everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
when old age ails me
when i must depend on someone else
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
it may be more obvious with cancer or aids
but we all share the same fear
of being alone at the end
old age is the final card that is played
if none of the others do it,
old age will, my friend
for everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
when old age ails me
when i must depend on someone else
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
sometimes i want to end it all while i can
rather than be alone when i'm helpless at the end
sometimes i want to end it all, do you understand?
no one answers when i ask who will be the friend?
we're all asking will i lose my dignity
will someone care
when the body fails me
when i can no longer care for myself
when old age ails me
when i must depend on someone else
will i face nursing home dangers
will i be put out with the trash
will i be at the mercy of strangers
wiping my nose, my drool, my ass will i lose my dignity
will someone care
for everyone is dying
and everyone is trying
to not be alone in the end
and everyone is wondering
the question is thundering
will someone be the friend
who will be there in the end
there was a time I was so adored
and I never meant to hurt anyone
there were people who knew my heart
where all there is is love and fun
there were people I trusted unconditionally
and people who trusted me
but I wanted too much and they’re gone
I pushed them away with my carrying on
cuz the first lesson I learn in life
was that people do not stick around
abandonment became
a self-fulfilled prophesy
and now my heart beat is a lonely sound
I wish I knew better back then
before I pushed away all my friends
I wish I didn’t test how much they loved me
just to prove everybody pretends
I wish I knew how to compromise
before I gave into all the lies
I wish I didn’t push everybody away
just to prove no one would stay
doesn’t anybody understand
I will die for love
and I have more than once in this life
won’t somebody hold my hand
to live for love
where is my long lost wife
I sit awake alone at night
writing these songs
dreaming of loving once again
do I hold on too tight
do I let go too fast
I wish I knew better now
than I did then
now I wonder did you ever feel as loved
as when you let me love you
was it too much or not enough
will I ever know what is true
now I wonder if you ever believe i
would love you beyond the day I die
here I am in a place with no time
still loving you – that is my crime
doesn’t anybody understand
I will die for love
and I have more than once in this life
won’t somebody hold my hand
to live for love
where is my long lost wife
I sit awake alone at night
writing these songs
dreaming of loving once again
do I hold on too tight
do I let go too fast
I wish I knew better now
than I did then
i was once so sensitive that i'd cry
if i saw anger in someone's eye
everywhere i looked i saw hate and strife
all the cruelty of every life
all i could do was hope it would end
when i found someone to be my friend
but i found no one who did not betray
the words of love they tried to say
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i think my heart and mind got old
and i think my soul was somehow sold
and i think i was never told
the truth
i was once so considerate that i would
give everything i could just to be good
for kindness was the best feeling i could feel
and giving unconditionally made it real
but i found no one would give the same way
people take advantage and then do not stay
but i found no one who did not betray
the words of trust they tried to say
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i think my heart and mind got old
and i think my soul was somehow sold
and i think i was never told
the truth
so is this pathos, a poor me song
is this a foolish game dragging me along
i don't want anything from you
unless you can tell me... what is true?
i was once so generous that i'd give
everything away, that's just how i lived
now i find myself alone and feeling so tired
i can barely remember how i was once so inspired
to believe in the human heart
and in love that never ends
now i find myself alone
wondering... where is my friend
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i think my heart and mind got old
and i think my soul was somehow sold
and i think i was never told
the truth
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i wonder if it's time to fold or unfold
and i feel like i have been rolled
and i think i was never told
the truth
maybe i'm depressed
maybe i'm a mess
maybe i am just tired of games
maybe this is your song
are you singing along
will you give me your real names?
is this embarrassing
do you feel anything
or have you grown this numb too?
i wonder what you think
i wonder what you drink
i wonder what surprises you
i was once so curious that i'd ask
everyone i met to remove their mask
everywhere i looked i was lies and strife
and i did not believe that was real life
I want to believe in the human heart
and in love that never ends
now i find myself alone
I don't want to pretend
it's ok...
I still find myself alone
wondering... where is my friend
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i think my heart and mind got old
and i think my soul was somehow sold
and i think i was never told
the truth
and i think i've grown hard and cold
and i wonder if it's time to fold or unfold
and i feel like i have been rolled
and i think i was never told
the truth
1993 we met in correspondence she knew exactly what to write to get into my heart and mind
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
1995 she confessed her love for me she told me her whole life was a lie she needed me so she could fly
love is forever love always grows this is the most precious dream I know
1997 two years of bliss and pain I gave her control of my brain she tried to make me go insane
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
1999 I gave her everything I could from far away I waited for her to do what she said she would
all the while she was begging me to hang on all the while she was asking for everything I could give all the while she was keeping me living in yesterday using the power I gave her to keep me so far away
1999 she begged me to hold on wait for me, she said, and I did even when she was gone
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
I never really knew what was going on all I knew was that my heart was gone she begged me to leave it in her hands is there anyone who understands?
2001 I crawled back to where I came from finding myself lost and broken half waiting half trying to understand what happened and how to begin again without my heart, how to begin again
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
2004 a correspondence, first time in three years I felt my anger and pain dissolve in precious tears I asked her why she actualized my greatest fear I asked her to return my heart and mind if she would not come here her silence fell upon me once again (I asked, why won’t you share?) her indecision rose like a wall once again (I asked, why don’’t you care?) only to find her that she would once again… disappear
I thought my heart was open I thought my doors were open I thought I was ready for love so why am I alone
I thought that I was free and I thought that I was me and I thought I was over the past I though that I had known
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
2008 again a few words from so far away she confessed she used me, what else was there to say was I the fool still waiting for her to return my heart? and now, am I free?... where and how do I start?
she said she married another and he gave her a child she moved on but she still will not let go there is no room in her life for me today but she will not let go is it because I know
love is forever no matter what this is the most precious dream I know
love is forever the best I’ve got how it can end is something I still do not know
all the while she was begging me to hang on all the while she was asking for everything I could give all the while she was keeping me living in yesterday using the power I gave her to keep me so far away
I never really knew what was going on all I knew was that my heart was gone she begged me to leave it in her hands is there anyone who understands?
she still keeps the best of me under her lock and key even though she started over long ago had another child with another man in 1999, oh and yet she still will not return the things that keep me hanging on so what am I to do when my heart and mind are gone? this is the only way I know to carry on
love is forever no matter what love is still the most precious dream I know
so afraid of living
so afraid of dying
so afraid of giving
so afraid of trying
feeling like i may be
the only one who isn't lying
sitting here alone
just alibying
wasting away
not even watching the world going by anymore
what's left to say
i left behind what i was living for
once in a dream
i fell in love forever
now it just seems
whatever, whatever
why should anybody care about me now
when i'm not ever caring about myself
how can i find a friend when i've forgotten how
all the dreams are lost up on a shelf
and i'm
so afraid of living
so afraid of dying
so afraid of giving
so afraid of trying
feeling like i may be
the only one who isn't lying
sitting here alone
just alibying
wasting away
not even watching the world going by anymore
what's left to say
i left behind what i was living for
once in a dream
i fell in love forever
now it just seems
whatever, whatever
somewhere buried in my mind
lost dreams calling from above
somewhere buried in my heart
i dream of falling in love
oh god i
still dream of falling in love
but i am
so afraid of living
so afraid of dying
so afraid of giving
so afraid of trying
feeling like i may be
the only one who isn't lying
sitting here alone
just alibying
wasting away
not even watching the world going by anymore
what's left to say
i left behind what i was living for
once in a dream
i fell in love forever
now it just seems
whatever, whatever
i don't have much time left in this life and all i do is work and moan
doesn't feel so good always being on my own
i don't have much hope left in this life for finding someone to love me
doesn't feel so good always feeling so lonely
will i always be
so afraid of living
so afraid of dying
so afraid of giving
so afraid of trying
feeling like i may be
the only one who isn't lying
sitting here alone
just alibying
wasting away
not even watching the world going by anymore
what's left to say
i left behind what i was living for
once in a dream
i fell in love forever
now it just seems
whatever, whatever
you say you want me to call but you don't like talking on the phone you like your talking face to face i wonder, how long have you been on your own you hand me your number as i leave and encourage me to care for myself now what am i supposed to make of that oh, what's that book up on your shelf?
is it pride and prejudice or is it war and peace maybe tale of two cities or the golden fleece is it something unique someone i never heard of oh... or are you writing something new and does it take two for the love or words or are we gonna fall in love
you say you want me to call well haven’t been asked for so long i like the smile on your face i wonder, what would you do with your own song you reach out to hug me as i leave i think i’m not sure i remember how i was feeling you pressed up against me oh what's that book your reading now?
is it the road less traveled or is it custer’s last stand quixote de la mancha alice in wonderland is it something brand new will it fit us like a glove oh... should i act like i have no clue or move like i do for the love or words does the answer come from above
what book do you read when you are most alone what book can take you home what book do you read when you’re most afraid have you ever felt saved by words or music or anything what book lives inside your heart i want to know your story so where shall we start
you say you want me to call but you don't like talking on the phone you like your talking face to face i wonder, how long have you been alone you give me a smile as i leave makes me want to take a good look at myself now what am i supposed to make of that oh, what's that book up on your shelf?
and you say you love the way i rhyme well where have you been all this time why should i give you what you want when i am still bleeding what are you needing why are you back now after all this time what's in it for me?
and you bring the same praise and etiquette another husband, but does he know yet why should i believe this is not one more set up to be shot i gave it all i got how much can we hope to forget and why should we?
what good is trusting you now it's hard to reach the middle of one's own back the knife has been twisting for years all the blood has thrown me off track washed away in a river of tears after all rain that has been falling i may have to hide when i'm calling
married women are nothing but trouble when you get too close even worse when you turn around and you've got ghosts
and you stroke my ego oh so well well why should i believe you now relegated to the trash for so long what could be missing from your life that you'd bring me back me and my knife do you want my blessing for your husband and wife do you want forgiveness do you want the knife how much more of my life do you want this time? and all because you say you love the way i rhyme -- what now, this time... the way i rhyme.
when i was younger and much more romantic i believed in falling in love even though i knew deep down it was a choice i willing gave up my senses and voice back then, secure as a friend, i believe in the human heart so now i wonder was it just false faith when did my dreams fall apart?
when people are cruel to each other when you try to fool your brother when people take all they can pretending to care till it's gone
i wonder what they discover what do you get out of it? if you ask me, people turn love into a pile of shit
now don't get me wrong see, i wrote this song with hope in my heart and tears in my eyes because i am scared i need a reprieve from the evidence for i want to believe but i see human beings everywhere we go destroying and hating the smile's just for show
you can misunderstand if you want to it's probably easier that way but if you're in earshot then maybe you hear what i say
i don't know where i belong humanity has love all wrong but i wrote this song with hope in my heart will you prove me wrong?
when people are cruel to each other when you try to fool your brother when people take all they can pretending to care til it's gone
i wonder what they discover what do you get out of it? if you ask me, people turn love into a pile of shit
you can misunderstand if you want to it's probably easier that way but if you're in earshot then maybe you hear what i say
i don't know where i belong humanity has love all wrong but i wrote this song with hope in my heart will you prove me wrong?
I suppose I could have forced you in spite of yourself all I had to do was support you and take all your abuse I suppose I could have heard you when you said you were a bitch and all you ever knew was using men like mindlessly scratching an itch
i could have gotten through a lot sooner than this before I hit the street so hard you know I made you the queen of everything and you wanted more, but you couldn't handle being god
queen of sheeba martyr hari mother diva wouldn't marry you just wanted everything heart soul body mind spirit life without strings
I suppose I could have been stronger in spite of myself all I had to do was grow up more and rise above your noose I suppose I could have broken you instead of letting you break me but you were already so damaged inside that I just let you take me
it could have been much less dramatic than this before so much life passed by you know how precious time is to me and you wanted it all but you couldn't handle eternity
such a waste of time such a waste of love did it make you better to watch it burn? ashes to ashes in your wake will you ever know you are less with every heart you break the more you give the more you are you only have what you take
I'd rather be than own that is being free... and home I'd rather give than take that is knowing love... awake
queen of sheeba martyr hari mother diva wouldn't marry you just wanted everything heart soul body mind spirit life without strings
lost in your fear you may never hear or know just what is wrong but maybe someday you will understand so on the back of a xmas carol... I wrote you this song
